Oh!
Ahhhh!
Ho ho ho ho!
Ho ho ho!
Christmas wreaths for sale!
Merry Christmas!
Why'd you do that, Max?
"Merry Christmas"?!
More like "Merry Disappointmas."
It's for your own good, kid.
Forget Christmas,
and candy canes, and fun.
Max!
A tree grew in the living room!
A Christmas tree?
Filthy chunk of wood!
I don't think I get what Christmas is all about.
Christmas is about setting out cookies and hot cocoa
so that, as you sleep, some jerk named Santa
can squeeze down your chimney,
steal said treats, and leave nothing -
like the one little cat toy you wrote, and begged him for,
and spent weeks being excited to get on Christmas morning!
Ohh, Puffball the Puffin!
Oh...
That does seem kind of unfair.
Yeah, well, who knows what goes on
in Santa's sick brain?
You know what would make a real merry Christmas?
Ooh! What?
For Santa to pay for his cruelty!
Some day... some...
Ma-a-ax...
I have a surprise for you!
Where are we?
Santa's planet!
Huh?
No, you've got that...
How did we even get here?!
Simple.
I ripped apart your cell matrix,
reducing you to a gelatinous substance,
which I ingested so that I could carry you
through a vortex.
Then I, um... "eliminated" you -
uh, reconstructed your amino acids and proteins!
Real simple.
Now let's go see Santa!
Fine, let's "go see Santa".
And then...
What?!
Merry Christmas, Max!
Santa's going to pay for his cruelty.
Stop!
Gark! No!
Prepare to be destroyed!
You can't destroy...
Oof.
Hmm?
Okay, you're not Santa.
Here we go again.
Let me guess.
I'm not what you thought I'd look like?
That's putting it mildly!
Careful, Max!
He's a hardened, cookie-stealing criminal!
Right.
This is Santa Claus.
Doesn't look familiar?
That's because he is Santa on many planets,
not just yours.
If this Santa showed up on your planet,
you'd probably soil your britches...
but, on Quadrozorb 17,
why, he's a jolly old fella!
Here are some more Santas!
But you're not even jolly!
Would you be jolly if you were stuck behind a desk
in a dead-end job, endlessly reviewing lists?
Uh... I'm not sure. What's it pay?
Sorry. My shift's over.
Oh, and I'm instructed to say...
"Merry Christmas."
Merry Christmas.
Who are you?
We want to know why you didn't bring Max
the gift he asked for.
Well, he's probably Schedule 9 -
"naughty list".
Me?! Naughty list?!
Oh, imposible!
"Max"... "cat"...
Yep, here you are.
"Guilty of... Christmas-tree abuse."
Ah!
Woohoo!
Uh oh.
I was a kitten! It was an accident!
Sorry. I don't make the rules.
Yes, you do. You're Santa!
He's the rules guy.
Merry Christmas.
Hey, dude wants off the N-list.
Merry Christmas.
And then we'll be going! Happy ending!
Okay. Fill out those forms.
Better get started.
Fine!
But I will get off the naughty list...
and I will have my Puffball the Puffin toy!
So... trying to destroy Santa?
Which list do you think you're going on?
Papers, forms, lists...
Now I'll never get off the naughty list!
Sorry!
Hard to see you behind all those papers!
Oh, say... What's the matter, champ?
I'm on the stupid naughty list, and it wasn't my fault,
and I never got the toy I wanted,
and now I can't get off the list!
You seem like a nice guy.
I'm going to give you a much greater gift!
Here... Have a bite of my fruitcake.
It's the fruitcake of wisdom!
You'll get to see just how awful your life would have been
if you'd actually gotten your toy!
Eep!
Oh!
My life would have been a million times better!
Huh. Usually works out the other way.
All I wanted was a Puffball the Puffin.
Let's just go down to Santa's Toyland
and get you your toy!
When I write your name on the naughty list,
it disappears.
You're also not on the "good" list
or the "let's see how they do close to Christmas" list.
You're not on any list...
which means you don't exist.
But, if I don't exist,
who are you talking to?
Aren't you Mr. Philosophy?
Look, the only way you could exist
is if you were on the Delta 21 list,
and, as you can plainly see,
you're listed right there.
What?!
Merry Christmas.
Look at this.
This is Santa's Toyland?!
I imagined something more... charming.
Yeah, and I imagined a life where I wasn't
tied to a machine 16 hours a day.
Yay, Christmas!
Say, I don't suppose you can give my friend here
a Puffball the Puffin!
We haven't made those in years.
Weird... because I heard everybody who got one
ended up with a great life.
Gosh! I'm sorry, Max!
But it's like I always say...
"Goodbye, now!"
Puffball the Puffin!
I'll tell you what Christmas is all about.
It's about getting what is rightfully yours,
even if it means stealing it!
I can't believe you are on the Delta 21 list!
Me neither!
Of course, I don't know what that means.
Just that you're a level-2,000 Spezoikaloid.
There's only 21 in the whole universe.
Cool!
What's it mean?
It means...
I want to tell him!
No, let me!
Forget it, dingus!
Watch it, halitosis-face!
Security breach at the Toyland.
Wait! What's a Spezaka-zeka-whatsit?
Puffy... at long last!
Waah! Whoa!
Oof!
I'll save you, Puffers!
Oof!
Whoa-oa-oa!
Max!
Santas and I are here!
Don't worry!
You are so not supposed to be down there!
This is your fault!
Christmas is supposed to be a magical time
where the dreams of little kittens come true and...
Do I even have to explain this?!
There's, like, a million stories and Christmas episodes
of TV shows that teach this!
I'm coming for you, Puffy!
Max!
Health and safety!
You're not allowed down there.
Santas, didn't you ever wish for something?
Well, yeah.
I wanted an L-43 photon-powered toy oven
to make plasma groat cakes.
Aw, get out.
I didn't know that.
I'd totally have gotten you one...
except that you were on the N-list.
Uh, guys... down there!
I wanted a tricycle.
Those are so cool...
but too bad you were on the list, too.
You've got to turn off the machine!
You know, we could give each other
those presents...
if something happened to the old N-list.
Noooooooo!
Ma-a-ax!
Puffy! You're okay!
Oh, merry Christmas!
Merry Christmas, Max!
You know, if you hadn't brought me here,
this would never have happened...
but the best gift of all?
No more naughty list!
I feel good about this job for once.
Me, too.
Hey, Gark...
What would you like for Christmas?
Uh, hello?
I guess I'd like to know what
you were going to tell me before.
Everybody...! Hey!
Sure. The deets are kind of fuzzy,
but you're, like, crucial!
You, like, have a galactic destiny!
Gark!
Whoa!
Uh, hello?
I don't think this machine is supposed to be on fi...
Aaaaaaah...
Gotcha!
Rudolph! Nice catch!
Wait. You're Rudolph, the red-nosed...
Hey, let me guess.
Not what you thought I looked like?
Good timing, Rudy.
We're late to deliver presents.
To Earth?
Nope. Quadrozorb 17.
What are we watching?
Is it cartoons?
I love cartoons!
Time to check the likes on my most recent video -
"T-Mort's Children's Lullabies"!
♪ Go to sleep... ♪
Now!
How many did you get?
Three?!
How am I supposed to win the internet that way?!
Max, do you like it?
I'd rather have Betty's knitting needles
jammed in my eyes.
That can be arranged.
Well, I like it.
As always, you're being too nice, Gark.
What's wrong with being nice?
It makes you
gullible!
You're right!
Wait...
Doesn't that mean I'm just being gullible
if I believe you when you say I'm gullible?
Listen closely, Gark.
Believing what others say?
Gullible.
Believing me?
Common-sensible.
Boy, I'm getting confused.
It's like this.
Gark, you're nice.
Max couldn't go one day being nice.
If he did,
it'd throw off the balance of the whole universe!
Really?
Gullible!
Hang on...
Of course I can be nice for a day!
Then why don't you do it, hotshot?
I will!
It'll be my New Year's resolution, being nice,
starting...
now!
Idiot.
Moron.
Do-over!
I want a do-over!
Fine.
What about you, Gark?
I can be nice for one day.
No, a resolution -
something you want to change.
Uh... Not to be gullible?
Ha! Good luck!
Uh, I mean...
"Good luck, Gark."
Thanks, Max.
Ooh!
We're going to be late for Ranceford's
New Year's Day rooftop party!
"Yay, Ranceford's party!"
I came over right away, doll.
Oh, thank you, Wilma.
I just need a little help
with my New Year's resolution.
Cat videos?
I'm as bad as you.
Well, don't worry.
We'll help each other get through.
I brought backgammon!
Oh! Backgammon!
It sounded so much like
"Let's watch cat videos!"
♪
Happy New Year, Gark.
And look... Max made it, too!
I'm shocked you got up off your butt.
Oh, Ranceford, you...
rascal, you.
I wouldn't miss it!
Okay, Gark... Spill it.
Well, Max's resolution is that he can go
one whole day being nice to everyone.
Hey, everybody!
Max says he can go a day being nice to everyone!
Say, Max...
What do you think of my sculptures
I made out of fur balls?
They're... so...
thought-provoking.
Would you like one?
Of course I would.
Thank... you.
What about your resolutions, Gark?
I've decided not to be gullible!
That's impossible!
It is?!
Ha! So much for your resolution!
What?
You said you were going to stop being gullible.
I said it's impossible, which it's not,
but you immediately though it was,
thus you're gullible!
Ergo your resolution is null and void!
That's mean!
Anton...
you...
blargon-brain!
Why don't you...
...go comb your hair?
Oooh!
Not bad, Gark. Not bad at all.
How about that Gark, huh?
Spicy!
Actually, one doesn't approve
of that kind of talk.
Ahh...
go comb your hair!
♪
Let's watch cat videos!
Betty!
I'm giving a puppy a massage on the internet!
I'm jumping out of a box at a baby!
I'm getting my head stuck in a yogurt pot!
Oh, no!
Are we seeing kitties again?
I'm never going to make it!
Now, now.
Maybe we can't watch cat videos...
but nothing says we can't do our own
"catting about".
I'll get the cat ears and tails!
I'll make whiskers!
So, Max...
what's it like being Gark's assistant?
It's an honor.
Guess he's always teaching you
the right way to do cat stuff?
The right way?!
Uh... He has a unique approach...
though he'd be first to admit I'm no slouch.
Really?
'Cause he says you're a poo...
poo.
I'm not good at this.
A "poo-poo"? He says that?
Very, very funny! What a delight!
Say, where is the little imp?
"Ahh, go comb your hair!"
Gark! Here, boy!
You okay, Maxxie?
I'm fine!
Thank you.
♪
Nothing like a massage!
Huh?!
This is my new video hit!
Meow!
Warning!
Space zit detected!
Threat level - disgusting!
Oof!
Gark! I'd like to make you a proposition.
How would you like to be the leader of
the Sunshine Circle of Cats?
Sit around on hot cement all day?
Oh, yeah, that's my idea of fun.
You're so funny, Gark.
Pardon me, Ranceford,
but, when I said that to you yesterday,
you punched me in the face.
Yeah, but Gark said it!
It's different.
It's like a breath of fresh air and truthiness.
Gark! A word, please!
Ahh, go comb your hair!
Yes, a nice hair-combing would do the trick!
Now, get over here!
Please.
What is it, Max?
What are you doing?!
It's my new resolution!
I'm being snarky!
It's really fun, and it makes everyone like you!
Watch!
Is that your tail?
Or are you being followed by a dead weasel?
Ranceford?
More like "Rancid"!
I was going to give you a nasty look...
but you've already got one!
Me! Do me, Gark!
What about me, Gark?!
Ahh...
go comb your hair!
♪
I feel bad for all the others out there,
trying to compete with my "cat ladies" video.
Uploading!
Space zit at hypercritical mass.
Excuse me?!
What space zit?!
An atmospheric pustule
caused by an imbalance in the universe -
usually personality reversal.
Max! He's upset the balance of the universe -
just like I predicted!
Why must you always be right, T-Mort?
It just isn't the same, is it?
Nah. I guess you're right.
I've been thinking...
Resolutions are overrated!
And, well...
one video wouldn't hurt...
would it?
♪
Go comb your hair! Go comb your hair!
Go comb your hair...?
Max! It's just like I prophesized!
You being nice is going to destroy the universe!
Ha ha ha! I see you're just
challenging me and my resolution...
but I'm afraid you've failed, old boy!
Ugh. Where's Gark?
Maybe he can talk some sense into you.
You're going to love this.
He's right over there!
So I says to him,
"Brains aren't everything."
In your case...
"they're nothing!"
Get that one, Nelson?
If you did, blink twice!
This is worse than I thought!
Gark!
Throcky!
Nice coat!
What happened?
Ya lose a bet?
♪
You and Max have got to stop doing this!
You've got to go back to being yourselves!
Ohh...
Should I?
Say it! Say it! Say it!
Ahh...
go comb your hai...
Eww!
What happened?
Space zit.
Y'all should have never tried to be who you weren't.
I was being nice!
Yeah... and look where it got us.
No. This was my fault -
for challenging Max in the first place.
What?!
You're taking the blame?
I am.
Throckmorton,
accepting responsibility for something?!
Yes. Yes, I am.
Uh... guys... up there!
♪
Oh, no! I take it back!
I had nothing to do with it!
T-Mort's never to blame!
It was this bonehead's fault!
He's the moron who's guilty!
Yeah, okay! Clouds are gone, plasma-head!
Dog-breath.
Goo-face.
Loser.
Yay! We're all back to being ourselves!
Happy New Year!
Check out these two
old cat ladies.
"Meow!"
Let us never speak of this again.
You got it, sister.